A New Year

2019. Such an odd number... but maybe odd is good. We need to shake things up and be reminded that it is okay to be uncomfortable and find contentment in a state of the in-between.

I just turned 22! (even though it is tempting, please do not begin singing Taylor Swift in your head! I want a different theme song for this year. I am thinking something like Masterpiece by Jesse J. Look it up if you don't know it! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=888dYl07d88)

"I still fall on my face sometimes, and I can't color inside the lines 'cause I'm perfectly incomplete. I'm still working on my masterpiece"

This is the year that I am a real adult. It isn't about being able to drive, it isn't freedom from parents, it isn't about being able to get into a bar, and it isn't yet about hitting midlife and reevaluating everything. This is year is about self-discovery, vulnerability, trying new things, and experiencing the world in all of its glory, creating who I want to be each step of the way.

A LOT has changed for me this past year; I have lived in four different places, met so many amazing people, started and ended a full time job, finished a semester at Perkins School of Theology, chose to adopt a kitten, and developed and changed in ways I had no way to predict or prepare for. I am extremely thankful for every last bit of it.

2019 is an odd year, but it is a year of possibilities, and I hope that there are moments of joy, love, laughter, and growth for everyone in this coming year. Life is not always packaged into a neat little box, but it is always full of surprises and potential for good. :)

Here is to a new year!

There Is Still Good

I have not written in a long while. I have become caught up with school, work, sleep, and swiping on social media, forgetting to cultivate time to sit down and reflect. Lately, the question on my heart and mind has been: Where is The Divine acting in my life and in the world? Obviously, being in seminary, I engage in a lot of conversations about God, but, it is easy to focus too much on intellectualizing God and forget to look at everyday experiences of The Divine. Even for those individuals who do not believe in or profess a certain religion, we are all a part of some larger picture… even science cannot explain why we exist. There are forces at work that are larger than us, no matter what name we ascribe to these forces or what we believe about life after death. This is what I am interested in. How is this larger force at play in our lives and the world around us? How are our lives all interconnected? How do my actions influence the people around me?

Now, it would be easy to jump to negative conclusions at this point because of all that is going on in the media and around the world. It seems like everyone is out to get someone. Gender, sexual orientation, religious affiliation, nationality, and so many other divisions exist in our world and seem to be dominating the narrative. Yet, I challenge anyone reading this, to stop and think through your day, you week, and even your year and think about all the moments that these divisions did not exist; when you shared a smile or a conversation, when you noticed something beautiful, when you felt loved or recognized, when you felt like you were right where you needed to be. Maybe these moments are rare and far between but hold on to them. Remember that you are not alone; even amidst darkness, we are all wrapped up in this crazy existence together. Despite what the media wants us to believe about the world that we live in, and even with the call to fight for change, there is still hope.

In my own life I am reminded of this daily through the friendships I am building in school to the fact that I wake up every day and can decide what to have for breakfast. Look around you this week and notice where God, The Divine, The Ultimate Mystery, The Force that envelopes us all is acting in your life and in the lives of those around you. Let yourself relish in the goodness that is within and around you.

Is America Really Free?

In preparation for July 4th, I decided to google search the definition of “freedom”. These are the first four definitions…

free·dom

[ˈfrēdəm]

NOUN

1. The power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.

2. absence of subjection to foreign domination or despotic government.separation · nonalignment · emancipation · enfranchisement · manumissionantonyms: dependence

3. The state of not being imprisoned or enslaved.[more]antonyms: captivity

4. The state of being physically unrestricted and able to move easily.

Is America really living into the value of freedom established so many moons ago? Is America really a place that lets everyone walk without constraint and fear? Does America really deserve to be known as “the land of the free”?

Thousands of families and hundreds of small children have come across the southern borders in hopes of a better life, to the “land of the free” only to be faced with the opposite of freedom – restraint on their ability to act, speak, or think for themselves, subjection from a cruel government, imprisonment, and physically being restricted and kept in warehouses and tight spaces…. All four definitions of freedom are broken and tossed away to be used for those that “deserve” it… those that are “American,” and born in this land… but we neglect to acknowledge that this was stolen land from the onset. America was a land of immigrants who sought refuge in a foreign place and displaced a whole other group of people they deemed as “other” to do so. We apparently have not learned from history and our past.

Coming up on the Fourth of July, the day of freedom and independence for this country, my heart is heavy. How can I celebrate this freedom when so many other individuals are being denied these same rights in the same country, and even more seriously, the same state? I go into this holiday reflecting on my own life and recognizing the privileges and freedoms I have been given… it is my responsibility and duty to extend grace to those deemed unworthy of such liberty. To truly make America great again we need to stop creating borders, stop separating families, stop labeling people as something other than human… we need to start loving more, owning up to our faults, and valuing every person as someone who deserves freedom and a life without restraint.

On Wednesday, the official day of independence, there will be groups of protestors going to local detention centers across America to stand up against the injustice seen at the border. This is the most patriotic and freedom affirming action I can imagine; fireworks and cookouts are enjoyable and bring family together, but they focus on our own pleasures and forgot about all those individuals not given the opportunity to choose and who are actively fighting to be free. I will see my family tomorrow and the next day… other children of God do not know if they will ever see their families again… the least I can do is stand beside them and hold them in love. America has a lot of work to do to earn its name… this is not truly the land of the free until everyone walking on this soil is treating equally, justly, and with compassion and love.

Further, the issues at the border are but one piece of a much bigger puzzle of injustice seen here in the United States and around the world…

What will you do to make America truly free?